Ep.26 – Discovering Meditative Peace and Power – Interview with Arianne Spahr

Podcast Date:

2024-09-13
Interview With:
Arianne Spahr

A wife and mother to three boys, Arianne Spahr is passionate about enjoying life and finding the joy within. As a faith-centered meditation educator and coach, she provides insight via multiple modalities:

  • Certified Clarity Point Coach
  • Certified in Faith-Based Life Coaching
  • Certified in Emotion Code
  • Certified in Foot Zoning
  • Founder of Small and Simple Faith-Based Meditation

"I created The Small and Simple to share my passion for helping people and teaching them to look at their situations differently. I have experience in guiding people through life changes because I have been through so many things in my own life journey including health problems, depression, crises in faith, adoption, adjusting to moving, marriage challenges and raising children.

Let me use my arsenal of tools, techniques and expertise to help you look at your hardships differently and learn through your trials. Allow me to assist you in finding yourself, to stand in your truth, and gain clarity about who you really are and what you really want."

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The Show Video & Transcript

 

00:00:05:08 - 00:00:06:18 Stephanie Hi, I'm Stephanie.

00:00:06:21 - 00:00:17:12 Seth I'm Seth, and this is the Forever Young show. The most powerful force in this world is a woman who knows who she is, why? She is here, and what she wants to accomplish.

00:00:17:13 - 00:00:24:03 Stephanie And that's where self-care comes in. As a woman, it is my opportunity and my responsibility to take care of me.

00:00:24:08 - 00:00:25:22 Seth Self-care for your mind.

00:00:26:04 - 00:00:27:12 Stephanie Self-care for your body.

00:00:27:18 - 00:00:29:02 Seth Self-care for your money.

00:00:29:06 - 00:00:37:15 Stephanie Our mission is to serve women as they fulfill their irreplaceable roles and families. Society. Business. The fabric of humanity.

00:00:37:17 - 00:00:46:01 Seth So let's get this show on the road. Well, Arya, we're so grateful to have you on the Forever Young show, too.

00:00:46:02 - 00:00:53:09 Arianne I'm so excited to be here. Such a neat mission you guys are doing I. Yeah, I love it.

00:00:53:11 - 00:00:54:12 Stephanie Thank you.

00:00:54:14 - 00:01:22:10 Seth When we talk about this mission, when we talk about championing women, I'm always very quick to say we're not empowering women because they already got the power, right. But, but, but supporting, championing, hyper focusing on women. You know, this this is this, this show is intended to be a weekly dose. It's not injectable, by the way.

00:01:22:12 - 00:01:25:08 Seth Okay. It's not injectable.

00:01:25:10 - 00:01:26:06 Seth Okay.

00:01:26:08 - 00:01:35:06 Seth And, I said that I said that for RFK. Let's make America healthy again.

00:01:35:08 - 00:01:36:14 Arianne Right.

00:01:36:16 - 00:02:00:02 Seth But this is a weekly dose of, like, your best friend. That's that's where that's what we want this show to be. From a self-care standpoint. So thanks. Thanks for being part of the the best friend the bestie conversation. I never said bestie until I met this woman. And so we started doing the show. And then it's like I've had to say the word bestie like 1700 times.

00:02:00:02 - 00:02:01:15 Seth And I'm sure all the women are like, please.

00:02:01:15 - 00:02:02:05 Seth Just stop.

00:02:02:06 - 00:02:04:22 Stephanie Mean nobody's twisting your arm.

00:02:05:00 - 00:02:06:03 Seth I've always secretly.

00:02:06:03 - 00:02:07:17 Seth Wanted. I've always.

00:02:07:19 - 00:02:11:00 Seth Wanted to be in the bestie circle.

00:02:11:02 - 00:02:13:00 Arianne The fifth club.

00:02:13:02 - 00:02:15:21 Seth Oh my goodness. I mean.

00:02:15:23 - 00:02:22:17 Stephanie I'm so Arianne. What are you most passionate about right now and what are you doing about it?

00:02:22:19 - 00:02:34:12 Arianne Okay, so I have three major passions at this moment. And my first is Jesus, of course. I'm wearing my shirt. It says freaking love Jesus.

00:02:34:14 - 00:02:35:21 Seth Oh my God.

00:02:35:23 - 00:02:37:01 Arianne I love Jesus.

00:02:37:03 - 00:02:38:20 Stephanie So I need that.

00:02:38:22 - 00:03:06:11 Arianne Okay. I will send you one. I've been having them made because it's my favorite thing in the whole world. There's a whole story behind it, but. So I love Jesus. And, I love my family. I absolutely love my family. And married. And I have three beautiful boys. 20 year old, 18 and an eight year old. And they I don't want to say they're my life because I think we need to have life out of, you know, family.

00:03:06:12 - 00:03:32:12 Arianne Because I think as women especially, we find a lot of our identity there. And guess what happens when we become empty nesters? We get very depressed. And so anyway, so I love my family. And then my, my biggest passion at this particular point that is bless my life is, meditation. It, is something I've found. It's been about it's 2018.

00:03:32:16 - 00:03:55:02 Arianne How many years ago was that? Not math person. But anyway, in 2018 and, it's just it's changed the whole course of my life. And so that is one thing. And, and my mission is, is with women, obviously. I mean, my husband does the meditation with me, but, the classes that I teach and retreats I do are mostly women.

00:03:55:04 - 00:04:05:10 Arianne So and, that's and that's what I'm doing about it. Like, my family is my first priorities. And so everything is time and season. I have a little eight year old.

00:04:05:12 - 00:04:08:17 Seth But, as much as I can.

00:04:08:19 - 00:04:14:23 Arianne I am trying to get this message out because. Because it's so beautiful and has blessed my life.

00:04:15:01 - 00:04:18:13 Stephanie So can you share with us how it has blessed your life?

00:04:18:15 - 00:04:43:17 Arianne So, so I've always been into self-development since probably I was about 18. I actually blame my dad for that. One time I was at dinner with him. I was a very, very, very negative person. I did not like myself. I thought it was, you know, just everything. And I was talking to my dad, and my dad used the term giggle, and I was like, he's like, have you ever heard of G.I. Joe area?

00:04:43:17 - 00:05:04:06 Arianne And I was like. Like G.I. Joe. Like, I don't know what God is. And he's like, garbage in, garbage out. And I was like, oh, and he's like, you are so negative. And it was. And I don't know if we just had never talked like this before. I was down in Provo working at a hair salon, and he was down, just visiting BYU Provo.

00:05:04:06 - 00:05:18:00 Arianne And anyway, so I guess first time we really talked, I don't know, like, like that. And, anyway, that that began the beginning of my journey. So I have been on a self-development journey my whole life. I come from.

00:05:18:00 - 00:05:19:05 Seth Because of GI Joe.

00:05:19:07 - 00:05:20:18 Arianne Because of it.

00:05:20:19 - 00:05:30:02 Seth So honestly, when he, when he first, when he first hit that, I thought, just does he not? And like, if it's a girl, it's like Jai Jai James.

00:05:30:03 - 00:05:34:06 Seth Oh yes. Yeah. She would say G.I. Joe. I know, like she.

00:05:34:07 - 00:05:41:08 Seth Saying G.I. Joe, I still I mean, I remember that from being like six years old. Real American hero, right? I remember the tagline.

00:05:41:10 - 00:05:46:14 Seth So I know true though. G.I. Joe. Yeah.

00:05:46:16 - 00:05:51:06 Seth Garbage. I was like, this was she was like a Tom Jones.

00:05:51:08 - 00:05:53:02 Seth Like, hey, like where.

00:05:53:02 - 00:05:55:14 Seth She where were you wearing camo at this.

00:05:55:14 - 00:06:01:07 Seth Moment? Probably, I don't know. Yeah. No. Yeah.

00:06:01:07 - 00:06:04:02 Seth But true. Garbage in, garbage out.

00:06:04:04 - 00:06:27:23 Arianne Cultural garbage out. And little did I know, this was going to start a past for me. That was going to be lifelong. So this is 18, I'm now 49 and I have just been on this path, and I've done multiple things. I've done lots of, self-help classes. I don't know if you guys have heard of impact or PSI.

00:06:28:01 - 00:06:51:10 Arianne I've taken to lots of classes and then lots of things and started learning about the Law of Attraction. And I, you know, Leslie Householder, have you guys heard of her? She wrote a book called, Hidden Treasures. So anyway, just been on this path, very into the health. Well, the reason why also is because I come from a background of lots of mental health issues, lots of emotional and mental health.

00:06:51:10 - 00:07:21:04 Arianne My mom was very sick when I was growing up. She was, you know, bipolar, manic depressive. And so, my belief system is that we carry a lot of that with us. Feelings buried alive never die. And so the things that we struggle and, Bill, as a young person who's little child carries all the way through us to our adulthood, and until we shift that, we have different ways of behavior and how we react and how we feel about ourselves.

00:07:21:04 - 00:07:42:22 Arianne So anyway, so I, have dealt with depression and anxiety and all of these things all my life. And I think that's why this, negativity was always coming out, you know, probably. And I was talking to my dad and, why I just, I wanted to start this journey and, so getting to meditation.

00:07:42:22 - 00:07:47:08 Seth So I had done all. Can I ask a question, Erin, though? Yes. Please stop.

00:07:47:10 - 00:07:48:23 Seth Well, we don't want to stop you. We just want.

00:07:49:01 - 00:07:50:05 Seth We want, we want.

00:07:50:06 - 00:08:10:19 Seth We want to we want to fuel the fire. How did you take it when your dad. I mean, that's a pretty impactful, potentially devastating, depending on how you take it. Especially if you're already hanging out in negative ville.

00:08:10:21 - 00:08:11:12 Seth Right?

00:08:11:15 - 00:08:16:22 Seth Right. Like, how did you take this as an 18 year old woman?

00:08:17:01 - 00:08:17:21 Stephanie That's a great question.

00:08:17:22 - 00:08:24:20 Seth You know, let's say I'm like back. And I remember back then to my my memory.

00:08:24:22 - 00:08:52:06 Arianne I still like I took it pretty well because when my dad pointed something out, I was so unhappy. I was so, happy. And I just graduated from high school just then to beauty school. And I think I was just so seeking. I just I'm like, why is my why am I so unhappy? Why is my life, you know, I was pushing every, you know, every move I was making.

00:08:52:06 - 00:09:22:16 Arianne And I think, you know, it was just a very God moment in my life that for my dad to give me some awareness. And, you know, that's also one of my biggest messages, is awareness can change us. When we have awareness, we can change. And so I think I took it pretty well because I remember going home that night and starting a journal and this is what I started writing I am beautiful, I am loved, you know?

00:09:22:20 - 00:09:44:03 Arianne You know, I just start doing positive affirmations because that was the only way I knew how to start the beginnings of changing this. I, I didn't know my dad had actually told me about a book. One thing about me I don't read, I have tons of book and I lots. And I always like recommend books, but I just almost like I go in and find what I need, and then I'm like, oh yeah, that was the best book ever.

00:09:44:04 - 00:09:48:08 Arianne But I had read very few books from beginning to end.

00:09:48:10 - 00:09:49:23 Seth But I always thought the name of the.

00:09:49:23 - 00:10:00:17 Seth Book, I thought you said the name you said, and I said something, you know, I had this book and I. And then you said one thing about me, I don't read. I like the name of the book.

00:10:00:19 - 00:10:01:12 Seth Right?

00:10:01:14 - 00:10:07:22 Seth Like, like I said, you start talk about positive affirmation. You said the book. I'm like, okay, it's going to be one of like one of these four books, right? And that.

00:10:08:04 - 00:10:09:00 Seth I was.

00:10:09:02 - 00:10:10:13 Seth Like, I've never heard of one.

00:10:10:13 - 00:10:13:03 Seth Thing. I read that book.

00:10:13:05 - 00:10:25:13 Arianne Way to clarify, I can't remember the name of the book, actually, I think I carried around for me for years, but I don't think I ever read it.

00:10:25:14 - 00:10:28:22 Seth Yeah. Positive affirmation by diffusion, by osmosis.

00:10:28:22 - 00:10:31:02 Seth If you if you just held.

00:10:31:02 - 00:10:33:00 Arianne It to my heart.

00:10:33:02 - 00:10:33:12 Seth What they.

00:10:33:12 - 00:10:52:21 Seth Say is you are the sum total, right? You're the sum total, or you're the average of the five people that you hang around the most with. Right? Which which is a very interesting principle. You you are more you know, you're you're the average of the, the five books that you carry around with you that even if you don't read them like.

00:10:52:22 - 00:10:54:09 Seth Every oh, y'all.

00:10:54:11 - 00:10:59:08 Seth Grab the Bible right now. All y'all grab the Bible. Just carry it around like I.

00:10:59:08 - 00:11:06:20 Seth Want to try this experiment. We're going to take the Bible bag the Bible bag experiment. And you're going to get a little stash.

00:11:06:20 - 00:11:17:02 Seth I think we should have them. We're going to print them with the Forever Young Show and you're just going to carry it. We're going to provide this. Oh, this is for the people who count how many times we say the word blouse.

00:11:17:04 - 00:11:20:20 Seth Good. You're going to say you're going to spend we're going to spend.

00:11:20:20 - 00:11:41:00 Seth You a little a little bag, okay? We're going to have a probably a small copy of the New Testament, the Old Testament, maybe, maybe we'll do the whole thing. And we're just going to ask you carry that book around and just and don't even read it. This is called this is called the Spa system.

00:11:41:02 - 00:11:50:05 Seth Positive thinking Mary Ann Spa. You developed this five years ago. That is so funny. Oh my God, I like it.

00:11:50:06 - 00:11:52:13 Arianne I think it could work.

00:11:52:15 - 00:11:54:07 Seth I think it could. It's placebo.

00:11:54:08 - 00:11:59:05 Seth I'm. I'm serious about to try it. I'm serious. About to get.

00:11:59:07 - 00:12:01:01 Stephanie Have a control group.

00:12:01:03 - 00:12:02:12 Seth And I'll be the.

00:12:02:17 - 00:12:09:11 Seth I'll be the I'll be the first test group. Like. What's that? It's a book I'm not reading. It's a.

00:12:09:13 - 00:12:16:23 Seth It's. A book, I'm sure. Oh, I love it.

00:12:17:01 - 00:12:22:03 Seth So anyway, you started writing back, back to the journal moment. I love ad lib. So that's kind of just how I is.

00:12:22:04 - 00:12:26:15 Seth But I get so you're there.

00:12:26:15 - 00:12:30:23 Seth Make it. Writing positive affirmations, which is always something a little foreign to you.

00:12:31:00 - 00:12:51:05 Arianne Yeah, it was very foreign to me. I didn't you know, I didn't. Yeah. And I and I wish I could remember how I started doing writing them, but I do remember going home that night and, and, and doing that and then, you know, and then it's just been line upon line precept, precept, I think from there, you know, my father has given me a little bit here and there as along the journey.

00:12:51:05 - 00:12:54:02 Stephanie So beautiful how he works like that, right?

00:12:54:07 - 00:13:24:02 Arianne Yeah. I'm so grateful. So grateful. So I was into this this, start out there and then I did all this other self-development work. And in 2018, my husband, I decide that we were going to move to Gilbert, Arizona, to take our boys there to go to school. And during that time we had just started a, a but we have a business, but we were launching a new business and did lots of things were happening.

00:13:24:02 - 00:13:43:18 Arianne The reason why we were going to Arizona was for one of my sons, because he was struggling and, when we got there, I felt like everything just started going backwards. Like, our business was not doing well. So financially, my husband's like, pull back, pull back. Like, we can't even make our house. You know, there's all these tricky things happening.

00:13:43:18 - 00:14:03:02 Arianne My son was struggling. My father in law died. I mean, it was just. It was, like, felt like the perfect storm. And I was having all these, really hard things happen, and, And my brother was getting married, and we went to his wedding, which was in California, and there was some family relationship, things that were happening.

00:14:03:02 - 00:14:25:10 Arianne And it was just like something broke and, we were driving from my brother's wedding, from California to my father in law's funeral and the Utah, and my husband and I couldn't stop crying. I, I started crying and I couldn't stop crying. I don't know what the definition of a nervous breakdown is, but I felt like I was having a nervous breakdown.

00:14:25:12 - 00:14:35:19 Arianne And when we got to the funeral, my husband talked to one of my nieces and he was like, I do not know what's going on with everything, but I am really worried and that is not good.

00:14:35:19 - 00:14:37:01 Seth And.

00:14:37:03 - 00:14:59:23 Arianne Anyway, I was able to compose myself and, and, you know, do the funeral and I cannot remember how I got home, but I got home earlier than my husband and my kids and the darkness, there was a lot of darkness that started to set. And I don't know if either one of you have ever been there, but, this only happened when my boys were little.

00:14:59:23 - 00:15:18:21 Arianne I have this happened another time, but it was a dark, so dark that I wasn't planning to kill myself. I had a kind of death, but I wanted to die like it was that dark, that I was like, I just want to die. I just kept tucked down, father. I'm like, I can't handle this. Why have I done so much self-development?

00:15:18:21 - 00:15:40:06 Arianne I've tried to eat well. I feel like I've done everything I know to do. And I am anyway. And I'm not getting the results I'm looking for. And so then I, Anyway, I wrote a letter to God. And if you guys pray this, you write a letter to God, he writes you back. And I was writing a letter to him.

00:15:40:08 - 00:16:02:12 Arianne And when I wrote him back, I hurt. I wrote, if you will meditate, you will heal. And, that's how I got into meditation. I'd been hearing about meditation before that because I feel like, another big tipping point in my life started when my son, Jefferson was born, which was eight years ago. And there's a lot that was going on with that also.

00:16:02:12 - 00:16:08:07 Arianne But so that's how I got into meditation, felt. The heart is directed there.

00:16:08:13 - 00:16:39:23 Seth When you say meditation to people, right? You you have this skill set to guide women into peace, into I was about to say Nirvana. But but into a new, into a new mentality. But what is their reaction when you say. And the answer is meditation.

00:16:40:01 - 00:16:41:02 Seth Well.

00:16:41:04 - 00:17:03:05 Arianne I hear a lot of people tell me, I meditate. That's what a lot of people tell me. That tension right now is a big buzzword. And, everybody is just seeking, I think, to find a place of peace. The difference is that my meditation seems to be a lot different than what people understand meditation to be.

00:17:03:07 - 00:17:04:13 Seth

00:17:04:15 - 00:17:21:16 Arianne And so that's why, you know, I did these retreats and teach classes to kind of help give the understanding and background of the meditation. I feel that helped heal my brain to bring me to the point I am right now in life.

00:17:21:18 - 00:17:40:06 Seth Oh, that was my meditative moment. I'm glad that so many women are already there. Or there are. They're already making steps. Because I tell you, when I hear the word meditation, I'm like boring, right?

00:17:40:08 - 00:17:40:22 Seth And like.

00:17:40:22 - 00:18:00:13 Seth Seriously? So I guess so. So I'm glad I asked the question because I would be going through and this must be painful for all these people, because meditating, meditating honestly to me sounds painful. Okay, you asked me to meditate for 30s. I'm in like I'm down with that.

00:18:00:15 - 00:18:01:13 Seth Right?

00:18:01:15 - 00:18:03:10 Seth Like, yeah, I mean, I'm going to put on my.

00:18:03:10 - 00:18:07:09 Seth Blouse and I'm going to sit there.

00:18:07:11 - 00:18:33:05 Seth Yeah, my stretchy pants. Sometimes when you are, when you are a man, you will just wear your stretchy pants. For those of you who not seen Nacho Libre, if you want to understand the psyche behind Seth Mulder, watch Nacho and and you will understand one of my, one of my one of my loves in my life, one of the lower loves stuff that I love.

00:18:33:07 - 00:18:36:05 Seth And I'm a Jew, and I'm. And I'm rooted in Jesus.

00:18:36:07 - 00:18:38:16 Seth And I say it,

00:18:38:18 - 00:18:59:06 Seth But, but I love Nacho anyway, I'm glad that so many women are already comfortable with with the concept of of meditation. And, you know, I'm wired a little differently. Like I'm go, go, go, go. And I know I need this, I need to slow down. I actually did 100 days of yoga, earlier this year, 100 consecutive days of yoga.

00:18:59:08 - 00:19:17:15 Seth And it calmed me like in ways. And then ever since that hundred days, I focused on a few things, like breathing. But I pretty much ditched my yoga routine. And I'm. And I'm like, talking to myself. And you know what? I'm coming back. Yo yo, yo yo, I'm coming back.

00:19:17:17 - 00:19:39:05 Stephanie You know, I, I think that's interesting that you're like, oh, it's so boring. I'm not going to say that I haven't had those thoughts myself. Like when I did go to your retreat, I was like, oh, okay, this isn't boring. Like, it, it it had a purpose. And, my favorite one was the guided one. I can't remember the gentleman's name.

00:19:39:07 - 00:19:43:16 Arianne But, it's called the release technique. The release technique?

00:19:43:18 - 00:19:52:14 Stephanie I think so, and I was amazed, how much it brought up. And I was able to work through it and process and.

00:19:52:16 - 00:19:53:22 Arianne And love it.

00:19:54:00 - 00:20:15:04 Stephanie And I think a, healthy amount of people probably start where you are to like, until they get a little more education or experience from it. Absolute like, okay, this is actually needed. Even if it does feel boring at the beginning. Then you can feel the power of it. And my first thought was when you said that was you.

00:20:15:05 - 00:20:19:22 Stephanie Now you're probably one of the types of people that actually needs.

00:20:20:00 - 00:20:22:04 Seth Work. So go go go go go. Yeah.

00:20:22:05 - 00:20:34:09 Stephanie Your nervous system needs a little bit of that. Yes. You look. Slow down. Let's relax. Let's actually feel our feelings and process them instead of constantly having something to.

00:20:34:09 - 00:20:37:23 Seth Do instead of running those feelings over like the Road Runner.

00:20:38:00 - 00:20:39:20 Seth Maybe you know what?

00:20:39:22 - 00:20:43:06 Arianne Yes. Absolutely. Absolutely.

00:20:43:09 - 00:20:44:04 Seth Yes.

00:20:44:06 - 00:20:48:18 Stephanie So maybe maybe we need to do 100 days of meditation.

00:20:48:20 - 00:20:52:08 Seth For that little. You can do it, Seth. You can do it.

00:20:52:10 - 00:21:25:20 Seth Absolutely. Well, you know, like I'm I'm totally open to that because intellectually, I know, I know that there can be great. You can discover new things about yourself. Intellectually, I know that that there's a piece, you know, and I'm actually I'm actually in a shift in my life right now where, hey, for me to do 100 days of yoga, right.

00:21:25:22 - 00:21:26:20 Seth And and 30.

00:21:26:22 - 00:21:29:19 Stephanie Was a shocker for me.

00:21:29:21 - 00:21:31:08 Seth Right?

00:21:31:10 - 00:21:50:02 Seth Yeah. And I found it. I, you know, and I was I was absolutely committed. I did not miss a day. There was a day that I woke that I fell asleep, and I woke up at 3 a.m.. And technically, it wasn't the next. It wasn't the next morning, so I did. Yeah, I did my yoga routine at 3 a.m. and then went back to bed right.

00:21:50:04 - 00:21:51:18 Seth

00:21:51:20 - 00:21:52:22 Stephanie Yeah. He was very committed.

00:21:52:23 - 00:22:14:15 Seth But I was committed and and I really enjoyed it. So I know there's something there for me. To, to me, it's again, because I'm so focused on, on things that I want to accomplish. Right? Right. Meditation can often seem counterintuitive.

00:22:14:16 - 00:22:22:23 Arianne Absolutely. And in reality, there's a book, written by Emily Fletcher, and it's called,

00:22:23:01 - 00:22:23:18 Seth Stress.

00:22:23:20 - 00:22:49:07 Arianne Stress less accomplished more. And she talks about this meditation. It's I, I'm thinking it's the same one that the same class that I took. I feel like kind of everyone's not everyone, but two people started this take this class and they kind of branched out within their own thing. But but that's exactly what I've seen, is that you you can accomplish so much more and your stress levels change.

00:22:49:07 - 00:23:09:15 Arianne And, the idea behind also meditation is it it's a shower for the mind. How often do we shower our bodies? You know what? Would you know what would happen if we didn't show our bodies for a while? You know, it's the same thing with the mind, you know, meditation is a shower for the mind. And they've proven.

00:23:09:17 - 00:23:10:20 Seth They have scientific.

00:23:10:20 - 00:23:35:07 Arianne Proof that when you sit in silence for 20 minutes a day, you know, if you want quicker results twice a day, it changes the pathways in the brain. And that is why it's so healing, is because it starts to get rid of all that old garbage and allows your brain to make new pathways powerful.

00:23:35:09 - 00:23:38:17 Seth I love showers.

00:23:38:19 - 00:23:41:18 Seth Like you said that. And all of a sudden I'm like.

00:23:41:20 - 00:23:45:01 Seth Dang, like like I.

00:23:45:01 - 00:23:49:23 Seth Like long shower.

00:23:50:01 - 00:23:50:15 Seth Yeah, I like.

00:23:50:15 - 00:23:54:01 Seth I like how after the mind, I'm in.

00:23:54:03 - 00:23:54:13 Seth Patient.

00:23:54:15 - 00:23:56:20 Seth I'm taking off my blouse.

00:23:56:22 - 00:24:04:04 Seth I'm doing a shower for the mind. I love it.

00:24:04:06 - 00:24:08:13 Seth I'm excited. Now, honestly, I this is so funny how the mind works.

00:24:08:15 - 00:24:09:02 Seth

00:24:09:04 - 00:24:21:10 Seth Like, when you talk about meditation, I'm like, I mean, I think you're fabulous, by the way, but I'm like, great, let's talk to women about meditation. But I do not want to meditate.

00:24:21:12 - 00:24:22:20 Seth But but, but but.

00:24:22:20 - 00:24:43:04 Seth Taking a shower for the mind. Now, that sounds that sounds relaxing, right? That sounds enjoyable. So can you can I take us there? Like, give us, give us a little crash course and maybe, maybe that's even maybe that's not possible because it's, teach us the fast way to meditate. Right.

00:24:43:05 - 00:24:44:05 Seth Hey.

00:24:44:07 - 00:24:58:04 Seth I will tell you this, though. The first thing that came to my mind when you said that 20 minutes of meditation and the shower, I'm like, great, can you teach me how to do that? In two minutes?

00:24:58:06 - 00:25:02:19 Stephanie I think, yeah, something like that was going through your mind.

00:25:02:21 - 00:25:24:09 Arianne But was more accomplished. More. Yeah. Well, I can kind of tell you like how it. You know, what you do. It's it's the most forgiving process. The most forgiving process. It's basically, you know, it's really important to find a mantra. And a mantra is a vehicle for the mind to excite the nervous system. So that's why you have a mantra.

00:25:24:11 - 00:25:55:00 Arianne And often it's a word that you're, you know, not familiar with. So you wouldn't do like I am happy, you know, there's Hindu words and there's Hebrew words. The word that I use is shalom and that means peace. And, when I was deciding and doing my little business and I was going, making the learning about mantras and all these things, peace is something that I didn't have for so much of my life that when I saw Shalom, I was like, that's my word.

00:25:55:02 - 00:26:13:13 Arianne You know? Everybody's different. Some people have to test them out. But, so basically that's what you do. You you find your your mantra works for you. You find a place that, you can meditate anywhere. By the way, I think so often people think there has to be like, I have, you know, we have to create our space, which is nice.

00:26:13:13 - 00:26:41:11 Arianne In my husband, I have, two chairs in our back and our bedroom, our bathroom, two chairs in our bedroom. And most generally, that's where we both meditate. But I travel a lot, and so I do it all over the place. It's just you want to just make sure you're comfortable and, you set a timer and it's usually for 20 minutes and you're just trying to get yourself in a deep state of relaxation, a deep state of consciousness.

00:26:41:12 - 00:27:01:22 Arianne And it's hard. I'm not going to lie. It took me six months and I had a life coach at the time, and she I remember I kind of was hitting guess that six month mark. And I said to her, I said, Suki, I think I'm actually kind of liking meditation. She's like, you crossed over. Like they actually have a name for it.

00:27:01:22 - 00:27:35:20 Arianne It's called the crossover. And some people, some people, it doesn't take that long because I this was my first time meditating. Well, okay, that's a little bit of a lie. I had tried three different other types, but I couldn't stand it. And it was really hard. And anyway, so I didn't stick with any of them. And I think after being compelled to be humble, whatever you want to call it, and I decided that I was going to do this, that that's I was all in, you know, and so then I didn't I didn't give up.

00:27:35:20 - 00:27:44:06 Arianne But it was there were days that I just kept opening my I am looking at the timer because I was like, oh my gosh, it's like three hours. It's only been three minutes. No, I.

00:27:44:06 - 00:27:48:17 Seth Took it took a long time. And

00:27:48:18 - 00:28:10:16 Arianne I heard a quote also during this time, and it was the purpose of meditation isn't to get good at meditation, it's to get good at life. And that's why I feel like this process is so forgiving. Because if you're having results, don't worry about what's happening during meditation. And that's what was happening with me was I'm seeing results very quickly.

00:28:10:16 - 00:28:21:08 Arianne I start seeing how I was handling situations and handling. So anyway, but that is that's pretty much I mean, there's a little bit more to it, obviously. Right.

00:28:21:08 - 00:28:22:21 Stephanie But yeah.

00:28:23:03 - 00:28:26:21 Arianne It's a very forgiving process.

00:28:26:23 - 00:28:34:00 Seth You really you ladies continue. I'll be back in 20 minutes.

00:28:34:02 - 00:28:35:03 Seth

00:28:35:05 - 00:28:39:01 Stephanie I think, we're going to hear some snoring. And just like.

00:28:39:03 - 00:28:40:08 Seth Okay.

00:28:40:10 - 00:28:46:08 Seth So so here's the question. Okay? If you if you fall asleep, is it still count?

00:28:46:08 - 00:28:55:09 Seth Yes, it does still count. Oh yeah. All right. Shower. Okay. Now we're getting sleep. Yes. In the beginning you will because you're.

00:28:55:09 - 00:29:14:21 Arianne Processing so much. Some people cry. I mean, they're just different ways people process. But I remember hearing that, like, you might fall asleep and that's not a big deal. I rarely fall asleep anymore. You know, like I say, I've been doing it for a very long time, but I don't. It's I think in the beginning people are just there.

00:29:14:22 - 00:29:25:23 Arianne There's so much in that little brain. Right? And it's never taking a shower and it's like, oh, you have to let me sleep because there's so much to clean, you know? It's the, it's a cleaning process.

00:29:26:01 - 00:29:44:02 Stephanie That's funny. I was actually just thinking about that. You know, the few times I've done meditation, it's so hard to keep your mind from wandering and, like, just thinking about all the random things or things you need to do. Or you know, how, like, different relationships that are struggling and how you want to help fix it or, you know, whatnot.

00:29:44:02 - 00:29:47:20 Stephanie And so yeah, yeah, that's a it's a challenge.

00:29:47:22 - 00:30:05:05 Arianne And it's it's normal. And you know, they say, you know, unless you're a monk and you know, like or meditating 50,000,000 hours a day or whatever you're going to have, I still have thoughts that I, you know, come and you just let them go. You just oh thank you. Thank you for coming. I, you know, it's just not focusing on them.

00:30:05:07 - 00:30:05:23 Seth Yes.

00:30:06:01 - 00:30:15:21 Seth So the idea is to just continue to repeat in your mind this mantra.

00:30:15:23 - 00:30:16:11 Seth Still.

00:30:16:13 - 00:30:32:08 Arianne A place for your mind to be focused, as you know, because you're still gonna have thoughts come and go. I'm amazed at how we can still. But is multitasking our brain? Like how, you know, I'm still saying my mantra is still, all this stuff is coming. And I'm like, okay. Shalom, shalom Shalom, shalom.

00:30:32:10 - 00:30:41:03 Seth Cheesecake. Cheesecake. Cheesecake. Cheesecake.

00:30:41:05 - 00:30:43:00 Stephanie I bring a little bit of happiness, but.

00:30:43:01 - 00:30:45:06 Seth

00:30:45:08 - 00:30:50:20 Seth Is it important that you have to be in a place where you can't hear anything? Because, like, we're talking to mom's here.

00:30:50:20 - 00:30:57:07 Seth Hello? No. Like. Yeah. Don't interrupt me. I'm in my meditation.

00:30:57:08 - 00:31:19:21 Arianne No, I have meditated everywhere on a bus, going to Disneyland with a bunch of core like, core staff. You know, people in choir. And my little book, when Jefferson was little, climbing all over me. I mean, I mean, it's just life, right? You just you do the best you can. And, I mean, this is one thing that when you are meditating, like when you come out, you gotta make sure you come out slowly.

00:31:19:21 - 00:31:25:11 Arianne So if someone does jump on you and you and startle you, then you just have to take yourself back.

00:31:25:11 - 00:31:26:05 Seth In.

00:31:26:07 - 00:31:38:08 Arianne And then, you know, come out slowly. But I've had all kinds of things. Jefferson pounding on my door. That is shalom, shalom, shalom, shalom, shalom.

00:31:38:10 - 00:31:42:03 Seth Shalom. Hello, hello, hello and.

00:31:42:05 - 00:31:46:20 Seth Good Sabbath to you.

00:31:46:22 - 00:31:52:23 Stephanie When? When he does, like, you know, pound on your door. Do you just ignore him and keep in your meditative state?

00:31:53:01 - 00:32:07:10 Arianne I do my 20 minutes up. Yep. I just gotta stay there till. Yeah, I don't get up and be like, hold on, Jefferson or. Yeah, yeah, I just yeah, that sounds horrible. I ignore him.

00:32:07:12 - 00:32:11:08 Stephanie That's what to me, that sounds so peaceful.

00:32:11:10 - 00:32:12:19 Seth Right.

00:32:12:21 - 00:32:13:22 Seth Well, the I got.

00:32:13:22 - 00:32:14:18 Stephanie Permission.

00:32:14:20 - 00:32:19:12 Seth To ignore the flip.

00:32:19:14 - 00:32:30:19 Seth This is a test right here. Because I'm imagining. I'm imagining just maybe, something we've experienced.

00:32:30:21 - 00:32:35:08 Seth But, dad. But dad and so.

00:32:35:10 - 00:32:43:06 Seth You know, exercising all patience. But on the 37th time, you're like.

00:32:43:08 - 00:32:51:07 Seth I'm taking a shower now. Like, now chill out. Now I can just.

00:32:51:07 - 00:33:06:02 Seth Be like, cheesecake. Almost, almost, almost. I don't want to make challenge a meditative challenge. Not not a get up and go challenge, but a meditative challenge. Say, all right, just keep your cool.

00:33:06:04 - 00:33:08:11 Seth Just keep your cool. It's all.

00:33:08:12 - 00:33:10:13 Seth Shalom.

00:33:10:15 - 00:33:13:03 Stephanie My from word. Besides, cheese came.

00:33:13:05 - 00:33:14:09 Seth From generation to.

00:33:14:09 - 00:33:21:04 Seth Generation.

00:33:21:05 - 00:33:25:10 Seth I was just, I was I just had this fun. Okay, I just have. I'm just in a funny mood today.

00:33:25:10 - 00:33:28:19 Seth You heard? Oh, I love it. I love it kind of like.

00:33:29:00 - 00:33:29:13 Seth This is who I.

00:33:29:13 - 00:33:30:12 Seth Really am.

00:33:30:14 - 00:33:49:06 Seth This is who I really am. I just I was thinking maybe, maybe, maybe we can do this together. I do meditation for, for 20 minutes every day for 100 days. And I'm going to go live. I'm going to go live and not say anything.

00:33:49:08 - 00:33:50:20 Seth I would to say.

00:33:50:22 - 00:33:59:16 Seth And just say I meditate and but it would be such an interesting experiment to see what comments.

00:33:59:16 - 00:34:01:01 Seth That would be friendly, you know.

00:34:01:01 - 00:34:31:11 Seth Like like like I, you know, I'm going to go live and I copy and paste. Here's what I'm doing right now. I'm on, you know, I'm on day one of a 20 minute meditation. When I did the yoga and when we did yoga, you know, we we actually recorded the entire yoga session. And then we had our son, who has a little, of a video editing business, and he would edit those and create 62nd shorts right from, from, from that.

00:34:31:16 - 00:34:56:22 Seth And so we posted for 100 days what we did, you know, okay, whatever, yoga. But I'm just like, what if it would be so if we doing a short for 30s, I don't know how interesting that would be, but go on, go live on your feet like this. And we're we're really into the self-care thing. And I'm just meditating for 20 minutes and then just go back and read the comments of people I don't know.

00:34:56:22 - 00:34:59:16 Seth Do you say shalom out loud or no.

00:34:59:18 - 00:35:08:08 Arianne No, you say, you say and yeah, you say your mantra silently.

00:35:08:10 - 00:35:09:00 Seth Yeah.

00:35:09:02 - 00:35:29:17 Stephanie Like it makes me think of, I don't know if you've heard of Toby Stokes. She's on Instagram and she's been through leukemia and has been fighting it for quite some time, and she dances every day. Well, she started doing it every morning and going live and just doing like I think it was like 3 or 4 songs.

00:35:29:18 - 00:35:36:22 Stephanie And I happened to to be on there when she did it and I was like, you know, I yeah, I think I'm going to join. I think I'm going to do, oh.

00:35:36:22 - 00:35:37:17 Arianne I love that.

00:35:37:20 - 00:35:41:02 Stephanie And so it may not be as interactive, but it could be really good to, you know.

00:35:41:03 - 00:35:47:05 Arianne Maybe surprised that the people that would join in and do it with you because it's a community, right? It's that support group.

00:35:47:10 - 00:35:48:11 Stephanie Exactly.

00:35:48:16 - 00:35:49:01 Seth Yeah.

00:35:49:02 - 00:36:05:01 Seth Yeah. What who the few people, the people who are need meditation right now. I remember when we did yoga, that 100 days, people started following that and people started commenting. It wasn't tons of people.

00:36:05:01 - 00:36:06:20 Stephanie And they started trying it themselves.

00:36:06:20 - 00:36:07:10 Seth Too.

00:36:07:15 - 00:36:24:10 Seth Thank you so much for giving me permission. I thank you so much for setting the example. We did super easy yoga like like it had to be at least a ten minute session that that was kind of like the, the, the, the base rule we had, it couldn't couldn't hurry. It was not like you can hurry through meditation.

00:36:24:12 - 00:36:26:18 Seth Come on. It had to be at least you know.

00:36:26:19 - 00:36:30:10 Seth So we were. Yeah. I'm I'm mean.

00:36:30:12 - 00:36:51:18 Seth But hey, thank you so much. You've you've made this attainable for me. Hey, I just did this. Hey, did we had other people saying, hey, I'm doing my own 100 days of something else. We were at an event in Nashville, and we had, had some, some colleagues at the at the, at the, at the con. Right.

00:36:51:20 - 00:37:10:15 Seth At the convention who said, hey, we've been watching yoga. I, I've watched you, but I don't know where to start. And so literally, we're there in the convention center on the platform. Right. And one of the halls there, about six, six people there. But one person, one person said this. There were about six others there. And we said, let's do yoga right now.

00:37:10:15 - 00:37:12:02 Seth Let's do our yoga.

00:37:12:04 - 00:37:15:14 Seth Day one. We did. We did a very simple.

00:37:15:16 - 00:37:24:11 Seth You know, movement, you know, stretching, yoga just to get them started. And yeah, that would be a really interesting experiment.

00:37:24:11 - 00:37:30:05 Stephanie Well, we have that other convention coming up. So if we start our, our meditation. Oh yeah. Do it live. You know.

00:37:30:07 - 00:37:33:16 Seth October, October in Kansas City. That would.

00:37:33:16 - 00:37:37:13 Stephanie Be awesome. So do your children. Do any of them do meditation?

00:37:37:13 - 00:37:39:20 Arianne Oh, no.

00:37:39:22 - 00:37:45:03 Seth You're never a prophet in your own home. That's what I say for my children.

00:37:45:03 - 00:37:48:23 Arianne I keep thinking, when are they going to join my journey?

00:37:49:00 - 00:37:53:02 Seth Yeah. And Jefferson always says, mom, no meditation.

00:37:53:07 - 00:37:55:10 Arianne He'll tell me, no meditation today, mom.

00:37:55:12 - 00:37:56:07 Seth I'm like, oh.

00:37:56:07 - 00:38:15:03 Arianne My gosh, are you kidding me? Now my husband has joined the journey and that has been life changing. So if that alone. But I think one day they will. I think one day out my voice will come along because I was talking to my, one of my sons asking them, I'm like, have you seen a ship? To me he's like, yeah.

00:38:15:05 - 00:38:17:08 Seth Absolutely.

00:38:17:10 - 00:38:19:02 Arianne So I think they've seen their moms changed.

00:38:19:02 - 00:38:24:05 Stephanie So yeah, one day they'll recognize that they they need to try it out right when.

00:38:24:05 - 00:38:28:07 Arianne They're 40 or 50. And I'm in my 80s, I.

00:38:28:09 - 00:38:29:20 Seth But you're modeling.

00:38:29:22 - 00:38:34:09 Seth The beautiful thing, Arianna, is you are modeling self-care.

00:38:34:11 - 00:38:34:23 Seth Thing.

00:38:34:23 - 00:38:40:01 Seth You are modeling your modeling your personal joy.

00:38:40:03 - 00:38:43:21 Seth And literally doesn't have to be their joy.

00:38:43:21 - 00:39:12:06 Seth But modeling the process is, is actually foundational because that whether they do meditation and yes, they may come to meditation because they've seen that most closely, sure. But that becomes a synapse. That becomes a synapse connected in the brain that what mom is doing is working. Right. She's making time for herself. She has boundaries. She cares for herself.

00:39:12:06 - 00:39:25:22 Seth She is number one in her life. Right. And and I can't yank on that cord. You know that bell to say, you know, feed me or, you know, like she's going to take care of herself? I think that's absolutely beautiful.

00:39:25:23 - 00:39:33:00 Stephanie Well, and it's it's so impactful and you're passionate about it. And so you're helping to teach others. And I think that's also a great example.

00:39:33:06 - 00:39:41:11 Arianne Yeah. Yes. Can I tell you guys the four things that I learned at this class and that I have seen, just.

00:39:41:12 - 00:39:42:10 Seth Absolutely.

00:39:42:10 - 00:40:10:09 Arianne With my boys, I was like, so when I went to this class, I'm sure you said other things, but these are the four things that I dealt with so that those important things that stuck out to me. But, he said it would be anger management. It would be anxiety and medication, depression medication and marriage counseling. And those were the four things that were very, very hard that I'd been dealing with for a very long time.

00:40:10:11 - 00:40:31:10 Arianne And I, I don't, I don't have any of those anymore. Like, I don't have depression. I have ups and downs. It's like hard. It's stinking hard. Do I deal with it now? Absolutely I don't, it's off. I was thinking about this process before starting with you guys. And normally I probably go like pee like eight times or something.

00:40:31:10 - 00:40:42:11 Arianne You know, like in my past, any time I would travel anything, I'm like, I'd be like sweating bullets. I can go pee 50 million times. I mean, I could, you know, I'm pretty sure I had major anxiety. I was like, oh, I don't have to pee.

00:40:42:14 - 00:40:46:00 Seth Like, this is a good thing. You know, I I've always gave my anxiety.

00:40:46:00 - 00:40:48:04 Arianne I'm not fat or not. Is that horrible?

00:40:48:06 - 00:40:55:03 Seth But so and I, I don't know, I think I.

00:40:55:03 - 00:40:58:00 Stephanie Do it right before every podcast.

00:40:58:02 - 00:40:58:15 Seth I do.

00:40:58:16 - 00:41:06:17 Stephanie You do like whether like I really have to go or not. I'm like, I have to go to the bathroom. That's funny. You never made that connection.

00:41:06:17 - 00:41:10:16 Seth I didn't, I always that is so many.

00:41:10:18 - 00:41:23:19 Arianne And, so the anger I'd, I did know I had major anger management, anger issues. Mostly it was towards my husband, bless his heart. I mean, he was just the closest thing to me. And I guess.

00:41:23:21 - 00:41:24:03 Seth I just.

00:41:24:03 - 00:41:31:20 Arianne Always want to poke his eyeballs out. Like that was just running well, of, like, I'm going to poke your eyeballs out, but just the anger and.

00:41:31:22 - 00:41:32:05 Seth Is that.

00:41:32:05 - 00:41:38:17 Seth Why he wears protective glasses?

00:41:38:19 - 00:41:42:22 Seth Yeah. You.

00:41:43:00 - 00:41:50:01 Seth The next time I see him, if he's wear if he's wearing, like, like protective sports goggles, I'll know. It's been one of those days.

00:41:50:06 - 00:41:51:13 Seth Now you'll know.

00:41:51:13 - 00:41:55:17 Arianne Aaron was angry.

00:41:55:19 - 00:41:59:06 Seth So, buddy. And then, marriage counseling.

00:41:59:08 - 00:42:22:08 Arianne Like Jason, I have been to several marriage counselors and, you know, we we we talk about this often because we are both great individuals. He's a red. I'm a blue. We just. There was just a lot of risk, miscommunication and not understanding. And, I don't know, but we started meditating and we. Our marriage is better than it's ever been.

00:42:22:10 - 00:42:40:03 Arianne Did we still get irritated? Absolutely. Do we still have to work through things? But we were we were at a point, but for about 15 years, you know, love like I was like, I am, I just think the only way out of this is divorce, you know? Anyway, not really. I don't think we ever would have.

00:42:40:03 - 00:42:55:04 Arianne But it was that hard. And I remember right after we were meditating and we started seeing some results, Jason gave a talk in church, and the first thing he said was, my marriage was hell for 15 years. Oh, like.

00:42:55:04 - 00:43:01:23 Seth Oh, I just. You know, it was so fun.

00:43:02:00 - 00:43:20:22 Arianne I mean, it was so but but it was so cool because I think it was the first time we gave talks in church and I talked about depression, and it was the first time we were authentic, like truly authentic. And afterwards we had so many people come up to us and thank us. And even, you know, the bishop was like, this is one of the best talk.

00:43:21:00 - 00:43:43:17 Arianne You know, some of the best talks we've had to, you know, and so it was so cool because I think when we started this journey of authenticity, you know, anyway, meditation, things shift inside of you. You can't help. And so, anyway, that was our, our marriage. 15 years of health. Anyway,

00:43:43:19 - 00:43:48:16 Seth But I love how real that is. I really love how that how real that is.

00:43:48:16 - 00:43:51:21 Arianne Because they're just hard.

00:43:51:22 - 00:43:57:17 Seth You were saying? You know, we still have our spats and, like, our arguments are like. Yeah, because you're married, right?

00:43:57:19 - 00:43:59:06 Seth Yeah.

00:43:59:08 - 00:44:20:13 Seth Because you are with this person. Yeah. Right. Right. Who operates differently than you. And you know who's little emotions you said anger, man. As you said anger. So of course I'm going to inside out and I see what I'm God, he's my favorite guy. And I mean, I love joy, like, I love joy because I feel like I super connect with joy.

00:44:20:15 - 00:44:26:22 Seth Right? That's kind of just how I feel. Like I live my life right?

00:44:27:00 - 00:44:28:17 Seth But I love the little guy.

00:44:28:20 - 00:44:31:17 Seth Like, I just love him. I,

00:44:31:19 - 00:44:35:03 Seth He's just so cute and cute.

00:44:35:03 - 00:44:38:16 Seth But he's volatile, right?

00:44:38:18 - 00:44:39:22 Seth Yeah.

00:44:40:00 - 00:44:59:02 Arianne Yeah. Well, so this is super cool. So Jason just gave a talk at church again, and and for the first time, I. He he said, I'm married to the love of my life. And it was it was so cute. I even when I was little, I was like, just. And he was he was like, I saw you do that area.

00:44:59:03 - 00:45:08:08 Arianne And and I thought, well, like, I can't believe how far we've come to marriage. 15 years of hell to I'm married to the love of my life. You nothing like we've made.

00:45:08:08 - 00:45:12:21 Seth Progress because usually people go in the opposite direction.

00:45:12:21 - 00:45:19:16 Seth I married the love of my life. And. And you in the last 15 years have been hell, right?

00:45:19:18 - 00:45:21:13 Arianne Right. Yeah.

00:45:21:15 - 00:45:26:18 Stephanie What a testament of how meditation. You know, how it can heal just whole.

00:45:26:21 - 00:45:27:07 Seth Yeah.

00:45:27:07 - 00:45:43:23 Arianne I think we are a message of hope. Because I didn't have hope for a lot of years. I felt the heavens were close to me. I was telling Jason this last night, I was like, you know, I even felt like, what did I do wrong? What did I repent of? That I ended up in a marriage like this.

00:45:43:23 - 00:46:02:08 Arianne You know, I because I had always been the person that was like, I went on a mission because I was going to have a good marriage. I left the marriage because of this. Like I had strings attached to everything. And when those strings didn't attach how I thought they were to attach, you know, then life was over, right?

00:46:02:08 - 00:46:24:05 Arianne Like, what did I do wrong? Why doesn't God love me? Why doesn't he hear me? Well, little did I know that Jason was the best thing that ever happened to me because he was part of my self-development journey. Because of Jason. That's another reason why I start to dig inside for truth, because I knew, you know, again, I think this is Heavenly Father helping me understand these things.

00:46:24:05 - 00:46:44:22 Arianne But I knew that if I divorced that I would just attract the exact same thing. So if I don't switch things now with him, I was just going to marry the same type of person. So, you know, I feel like through our journey, we've had these little nuggets of, you know, truths that have kept us going. And so anyway, so grateful.

00:46:44:22 - 00:46:49:21 Arianne Can I tell you I'm so grateful.

00:46:49:23 - 00:47:13:11 Stephanie Talking about how you guys got up and were very real and authentic and, speaking at church, I saw this real the other day, and it's this woman. And did I send it to you? I don't know if I did, I don't know, but she's, She's singing and the above at the top of the the meme or real or whatever.

00:47:13:11 - 00:47:33:04 Stephanie It said something about when. Oh, shoot. What was it when you've processed your trauma and figuring things out or something like that. It was really funny. And so she just sitting there seeing it and she's talking about, you know, how she's done drugs. And when you ask them how, you know, he's eating the food, Lord, I've eaten the food.

00:47:33:04 - 00:47:35:22 Seth That's after so much food. And.

00:47:36:00 - 00:47:37:18 Stephanie You know, it did not bring happiness.

00:47:37:21 - 00:47:39:02 Seth I'm like, all.

00:47:39:02 - 00:47:43:21 Stephanie This is singing hilarious. I'm laughing my guts out. And I probably watched it at least 5 or 6 times.

00:47:43:21 - 00:47:45:10 Seth Oh, I love it.

00:47:45:12 - 00:47:48:08 Stephanie And then to see, you know, the backup singers behind her. And one.

00:47:48:08 - 00:47:49:01 Seth Of them was.

00:47:49:03 - 00:47:50:06 Stephanie At the end, she's like.

00:47:50:08 - 00:47:56:18 Seth That's like what? It's like, not a confession. But.

00:47:56:20 - 00:48:11:06 Stephanie You know, I started reading the comments. Sometimes I feel like I can find so much from the comments, right? Whether it's good or bad. Sir. And somebody said, because there were a lot of people that were like, ooh, girl. Like, you know, this is not confession time.

00:48:11:08 - 00:48:12:17 Seth You know, I'm like.

00:48:12:19 - 00:48:26:05 Stephanie Oh, you know, a little too much about you or different things. But then this one comment really changed my perspective because, I mean, I'm not going to lie, I was a little bit like, oh, you know, some of the things you said, I won't even say it out.

00:48:26:08 - 00:48:28:05 Seth Of your.

00:48:28:07 - 00:48:28:17 Stephanie Hands.

00:48:28:19 - 00:48:34:21 Seth But this apparently there was more than just.

00:48:34:23 - 00:48:35:21 Seth

00:48:35:23 - 00:48:54:06 Stephanie But this comment was, you know, it's interesting that a lot of people want to be a safe place, and they want to say, you can come to church and you can talk about these things, but then once they are said over the pulpit, so many people like retract and they're like, oh, I'm uncomfortable. Oh, we can't talk about this.

00:48:54:06 - 00:48:55:10 Arianne Absolutely.

00:48:55:12 - 00:49:05:11 Stephanie And it really, really made me think twice. Like, yes, that should be one of the safest places that we can talk about our struggles and also our triumphs.

00:49:05:13 - 00:49:11:18 Arianne Absolutely. Because it's for the, the, the sick. Right? Not the. Yes. The whole I mean.

00:49:11:20 - 00:49:13:12 Stephanie It's the it's not for the perfect.

00:49:13:13 - 00:49:20:04 Arianne It's for the, it's not for the perfect. We should be having people who smell like smoke, you know, I mean, we should be having all of that.

00:49:20:06 - 00:49:20:19 Stephanie Yes.

00:49:20:19 - 00:49:23:09 Arianne Come and love Jesus. That's what I say.

00:49:23:12 - 00:49:23:21 Stephanie Yes.

00:49:24:00 - 00:49:26:02 Seth Freaking love Jesus.

00:49:26:04 - 00:49:29:00 Arianne I freaking love him so much.

00:49:29:02 - 00:49:32:19 Seth I do.

00:49:32:21 - 00:49:35:11 Stephanie Think of our previous guests. She's freaking.

00:49:35:11 - 00:49:39:02 Seth Amazing. They said I'm freaking awesome.

00:49:39:04 - 00:49:41:08 Seth Awesome. That was her.

00:49:41:10 - 00:50:07:01 Seth That was her. I was just literally as you as you were saying what you're saying. Ariana I was thinking about Stacy Simmons, who has, episode 23. We just had Ashlyn a episode 24 actually was episode 25. And I was thinking, we are having the most amazing conversations. Ariana, you've just like the first. I know we're only a third of the way through.

00:50:07:03 - 00:50:09:21 Seth

00:50:09:23 - 00:50:12:09 Seth

00:50:12:11 - 00:50:26:07 Seth But, wow, like, I, like I am enriched today. I'm so glad I showed up for this conversation. And you have brought just a revelation. Honestly, a revelation to my life. So thank you.

00:50:26:08 - 00:50:27:04 Seth Thank you.

00:50:27:06 - 00:50:45:03 Arianne Thank you. It actually makes me emotional because I. I feel like that's why we go through the things we go through so that we can bless the lives of others. Like the two great commandments. Love God, love your neighbor. Those are what I live by. And that's that's what matters most to me. So I can change a life.

00:50:45:06 - 00:50:47:18 Arianne That's all I care about.

00:50:47:20 - 00:50:49:03 Stephanie So it's not worth it.

00:50:49:08 - 00:50:59:17 Seth I'm just think about all these amazing women that we're having this conversation with. I think someday, I don't know, I don't know if I'm gonna be in heaven or if we can if we can do some sort of self self-care, self-care, calm.

00:50:59:18 - 00:51:01:21 Seth Self care for women.

00:51:01:23 - 00:51:04:02 Seth Amazing what we've thought.

00:51:04:02 - 00:51:04:21 Seth About, amazing.

00:51:05:03 - 00:51:06:06 Seth Thought about through an event.

00:51:06:07 - 00:51:30:19 Arianne You should because can I tell you, just in the last year where I live, we've had three suicides of teenagers. Oh my goodness. And the two of them are my son's friends. He knew them. He wasn't close with them, but he knew them. And lately I've been, you know, driving around just thinking so much about this, how can we help our youth?

00:51:30:21 - 00:51:54:15 Arianne And I do believe it goes back to self-care, self-development, learning to put tools in our toolbox so that we can combat these different things, you know, like controlling these mind games that are so real and so constant. And then I'm not good enough. Why are you even here? What is, you know, anyway? And I don't know what people are told in their home either.

00:51:54:15 - 00:52:14:07 Arianne I don't know the abuse that happens. I don't know any of that. But I do know we can come back from all of it. I do know that. I do know with my journey and the things I've been through, I know it can be healed. Is life still hard? Absolutely. Am I still having. The last two years have been the trickiest years.

00:52:14:09 - 00:52:35:04 Arianne But am I thriving? I'm thriving. I can actually say that I feel peace and joy in the chaos, and that is what's important to me. How I define success has changed so much. You know, I used to think success was how much money you made or what you were, what you had, and all of these different things. That's not success.

00:52:35:06 - 00:52:50:18 Arianne This is my favorite quote. A champion is defined not by the wins that how they recover from the fall. That is my favorite quote. Sorry, I just happened to have it sitting here by me.

00:52:50:20 - 00:52:53:07 Seth No, it wouldn't be.

00:52:53:09 - 00:52:59:07 Seth It wouldn't. No apology. Stop. No apology. Care like you got. You got the mic, girl.

00:52:59:09 - 00:53:01:09 Seth But it it wouldn't, it.

00:53:01:09 - 00:53:06:12 Seth Wouldn't be appropriate. Like it wouldn't fly with Stephanie who is the queen of quotes.

00:53:06:14 - 00:53:07:21 Seth Right.

00:53:07:23 - 00:53:11:02 Seth And we seem to be attracting women who are the queen of quotes.

00:53:11:04 - 00:53:21:20 Seth Onto the show. So if you didn't hold up your platform, you know, then it's like we can't call her back. And I say, I am.

00:53:21:20 - 00:53:23:19 Arianne Amongst my people then because.

00:53:23:19 - 00:53:25:18 Seth I love quotes.

00:53:25:20 - 00:53:33:17 Stephanie It was a blessing and a curse when I figured out how to screenshot on my phone right? Because at least half of my screenshots or more are quotes.

00:53:33:18 - 00:53:37:06 Arianne Yes, am a fan out of storage and that's what they were.

00:53:37:08 - 00:53:57:11 Stephanie Yes, I'm like, how can I delete this? Oh, stop in how inspiring. But I will say, it's been really neat to actually go back and read some of the quotes and to realize how powerful they were for me and how they've helped develop who I am, and also how some of them I've grown out of them is.

00:53:57:11 - 00:54:10:16 Stephanie And I'm like, cool, okay, I can delete this one because it it doesn't have the power that it used to have for me. And I need to make space for the new quotes that are gonna come in. I love that, I love that.

00:54:10:18 - 00:54:17:00 Arianne Absolutely love that. That's a new way for me to look at quotes. Now to, because I need to delete a lot messes.

00:54:17:01 - 00:54:22:11 Seth I gotta delete some of it. So I'm like, oh, I don't know, tell me about it.

00:54:22:14 - 00:54:29:02 Arianne But girl seven thank you. You've given me. Okay, now you can go and do some dunking.

00:54:29:04 - 00:54:30:02 Stephanie Yes. You're welcome.

00:54:30:02 - 00:54:30:10 Seth You just.

00:54:30:11 - 00:54:38:06 Seth Yeah, I don't need I don't need this anymore. I don't use this piece of furniture. Yeah I don't I don't need this for comfort or inspiration.

00:54:38:08 - 00:54:38:21 Seth Yeah, right.

00:54:39:03 - 00:54:52:14 Stephanie And sometimes if I do feel like I have the time and the capacity, I've started just a binder that has, lined paper in it, and I can write down quotes that I do want to keep and then I can delete them.

00:54:52:16 - 00:54:54:01 Arianne I love that.

00:54:54:03 - 00:54:58:13 Stephanie No, I haven't done it in a while.

00:54:58:15 - 00:55:02:15 Stephanie But I do have some quotes floating around in a binder.

00:55:02:17 - 00:55:03:18 Seth And the answer is.

00:55:03:18 - 00:55:06:23 Seth Whenever you upgrade your phone, just get more storage.

00:55:07:01 - 00:55:07:08 Seth Right?

00:55:07:13 - 00:55:09:15 Arianne Orange.

00:55:09:17 - 00:55:11:03 Seth Oh, I love it.

00:55:11:05 - 00:55:29:18 Seth Well, I want to hear the I want to hear the story behind these freaking Love Jesus shirts. Oh, this whole thing you said there's a story there, am I right? And that was the first question I wanted to ask. But. But I'm glad that we've taken the, the pathway that we have, the journey that we've had this morning.

00:55:29:19 - 00:55:37:07 Arianne Okay, perfect. So my son Jackson is on mission in Boston, Massachusetts.

00:55:37:09 - 00:55:41:19 Seth And, he's serving full time evangelization.

00:55:41:20 - 00:55:54:05 Arianne Yeah. Yep. For the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter day Saints. And, he I've always told my boys, like, of course I want him to serve a mission. I think it's an experience you can never take back.

00:55:54:07 - 00:55:55:13 Seth Or tell with him.

00:55:55:15 - 00:56:10:10 Arianne He's 20, he's 20. So I've always told my boys, that, you know, it's your choice. I want you to go, to serve Jesus. I want you to go because it's the right, you know, not the right thing to do. That's what I would do. Said. I said, I don't want you to go because it's the right thing to do.

00:56:10:15 - 00:56:13:21 Arianne Because you're supposed to. And, you know.

00:56:13:23 - 00:56:15:06 Seth I want you to go because you want to go.

00:56:15:06 - 00:56:27:18 Arianne I want you to go because I want you to go serve Jesus. I want you to go because you're all in. And so. So it took my son two years to decide. You know, at one point he was like, I don't know if I'm going to go, mom. I'm like, okay, you know, you know, I just wanted to support him where he was at.

00:56:27:18 - 00:56:48:17 Arianne And and then one time we were driving and he said, mom, I think I've decided to go. And I was like, okay, you know, like, anyway, just so cool. So when he gave his farewell talk, it was just so real and raw and authentic. He didn't write anything. He just got up there. And I think instead of bearing his testimony, I can't really fulfill or remember.

00:56:48:17 - 00:56:58:12 Arianne But his very last words were, I freaking love Jesus. And it was so cool. And and you know.

00:56:58:14 - 00:57:01:05 Seth I had of course, I was like, that is so cool.

00:57:01:07 - 00:57:19:11 Arianne And, and he just I just think the courage to I mean, I know that sounds weird, but I do sometimes think it takes courage to say something different out of the script of how most people normally do things. And I think I'm one of those that have been unscripted since my eight year old son was born. But,

00:57:19:12 - 00:57:24:14 Arianne Okay. Afterwards, so many people.

00:57:24:15 - 00:57:24:23 Seth That's.

00:57:24:23 - 00:57:30:05 Arianne The only thing they remember about us talk was I freaking love Jesus.

00:57:30:07 - 00:57:34:19 Seth So I thought, I need to make sure that they freaking love Jesus, and.

00:57:34:19 - 00:57:39:13 Arianne I'm going to start handing them out anyway. It's been really fun. Everybody wants one, so.

00:57:39:15 - 00:57:41:22 Seth Yes, I am.

00:57:42:00 - 00:57:55:07 Arianne And I wear them everywhere. I do get some funny looks. I'm not going to lie. Sometimes people are like, oh, but I think in the South I would totally be like, everyone would love me to death. Looking at my shirts that,

00:57:55:09 - 00:57:58:14 Seth Girl I freaking love Jesus looks free.

00:57:58:14 - 00:58:07:02 Arianne I love you. Anyway, so that's a story, but I hold it close to my heart, obviously, because it's my my oldest son and.

00:58:07:04 - 00:58:08:02 Seth

00:58:08:04 - 00:58:21:16 Arianne All three of my boys are adopted, and that's its own journey of itself, right? So everybody has their journey and everybody has their stories. But, love my love. My boys.

00:58:21:18 - 00:58:23:05 Stephanie And Jesus.

00:58:23:07 - 00:58:28:05 Seth And Jesus.

00:58:28:07 - 00:58:32:09 Arianne I think I make people a little bit nervous sometimes because I get all Jesus crazy.

00:58:32:10 - 00:58:33:19 Stephanie That's okay.

00:58:33:21 - 00:58:35:16 Seth Okay, listen.

00:58:35:18 - 00:58:41:15 Stephanie Me too. I'm. I'm frequently talking about Jesus. And on the how Jesus is coming.

00:58:41:17 - 00:58:43:01 Seth Yes.

00:58:43:03 - 00:59:10:11 Seth So, Ariane, you talked about. Ben, you've been, there's a transition when Jefferson came into your life. He's eight now, right? You've been on scripting a lot of things as you work with women in, in, in teaching them, guiding them through meditations in, do you do private do you, do you how do you administer this primarily before I, before I ask the question.

00:59:10:16 - 00:59:15:12 Seth Okay, let me set the ground like you connect with women at retreats.

00:59:15:14 - 00:59:15:21 Arianne Yes.

00:59:15:21 - 00:59:24:05 Seth And, and do you practice outside of that? Like how how do you how can women get these resources, these messages?

00:59:24:05 - 00:59:52:12 Arianne Okay. So, right now it's been retreats. I've done a few of my very own just meditation only retreats. And then I've helped participate in other people's retreats and teach. And, that's mostly it at this point. I've just been trying to do, you know, teach classes, and, I'd like to start doing more on the local level, just putting classes together so that but I do feel like I've reached quite a few people.

00:59:52:12 - 00:59:56:17 Arianne I've been getting testimonials and, and like, wow, it's it's working.

00:59:56:19 - 00:59:59:01 Seth Like you're always so.

00:59:59:01 - 01:00:04:13 Arianne Grateful when you hear stuff and you're like, oh, okay, I'm not crazy.

01:00:04:15 - 01:00:05:14 Seth Totally.

01:00:05:18 - 01:00:28:07 Arianne But you hear other people's stories. But so that that is the main I'm hoping to grow, you know, grow bigger. But again, time and season, my, my time is mostly important right now for my boys and my little eight year old. But I do feel Heavenly Father's hand and things moving quicker. Like I'm amazed at the things that are coming up and things are moving quicker for me to get the message out.

01:00:28:07 - 01:00:31:16 Seth More like self care for women. God.

01:00:31:18 - 01:00:36:03 Seth Right? And I was like, oh my gosh, if this is a self-care for women.

01:00:36:03 - 01:00:42:19 Seth Self-care can well, like, well, what do we need to call this event? And do? You can do a meditation class there.

01:00:42:21 - 01:00:44:00 Arianne I'll be there.

01:00:44:02 - 01:00:45:18 Seth Absolutely.

01:00:45:20 - 01:00:47:11 Seth For 5000 women.

01:00:47:13 - 01:00:50:07 Arianne Wouldn't that be amazing? Would that not be sticking?

01:00:50:07 - 01:00:54:05 Seth Amazing that I'd be stinking miracle. 5000.

01:00:54:05 - 01:00:55:04 Seth Women in a room.

01:00:55:04 - 01:00:56:23 Seth Not saying anything.

01:00:57:01 - 01:01:02:11 Seth For 20.

01:01:02:13 - 01:01:03:04 Seth Minute book.

01:01:03:04 - 01:01:04:07 Seth World records. Right?

01:01:04:07 - 01:01:07:07 Seth There it is. Yes, but I've seen.

01:01:07:07 - 01:01:09:10 Arianne It happen on retreats. Right, Steph?

01:01:09:12 - 01:01:11:03 Stephanie Yes, yes.

01:01:11:03 - 01:01:14:22 Arianne And I'm amazed at how much they look forward to it, you know, like.

01:01:15:00 - 01:01:19:05 Stephanie Anyway, yeah, I was sad. I slept in one morning.

01:01:19:07 - 01:01:27:13 Seth I was yeah, I missed the first one.

01:01:27:15 - 01:01:28:09 Seth What?

01:01:28:11 - 01:01:34:12 Seth I'm just thinking about all of the memes and all of the funny things. And I say this with all the love.

01:01:34:12 - 01:01:37:05 Seth For women and, you know, because.

01:01:37:05 - 01:01:55:11 Seth One of the beautiful gifts in authenticity, authentic piece of women is their a, their ability to connect and to communicate, spoken and unspoken. But I'm just thinking that all the funny things, you know, bringing the cameras will bring all these women's boyfriends and, and husbands, you know, and just like, we'll just sneak them in to watch suplex, you guys.

01:01:55:11 - 01:01:56:02 Seth Just, like.

01:01:56:04 - 01:01:58:22 Seth Watch this for 20 minutes.

01:01:59:00 - 01:02:00:03 Seth You know, they might.

01:02:00:05 - 01:02:01:12 Arianne Have they pay to go.

01:02:01:14 - 01:02:02:13 Seth Do that actually.

01:02:02:16 - 01:02:07:21 Seth So anyway. Anyway. Anyway. Oh. So here's the question I wanted to ask the question.

01:02:08:02 - 01:02:08:17 Seth The question is, as.

01:02:08:17 - 01:02:34:12 Seth You work with women in this intimate setting, and you talked about unscripted because you're unscripted things. What, what what are common falsehoods, false principles, false narratives that you see, women need to be unscripted. I'm kind of thinking more from a global.

01:02:34:12 - 01:02:34:23 Seth Perspective.

01:02:34:23 - 01:02:35:13 Arianne To global.

01:02:35:13 - 01:02:39:03 Seth Women in general. You know, like the big trans like.

01:02:39:05 - 01:02:54:22 Arianne Well, I think and I'm not good enough. I think that sometimes is the core root of why women do the things they do. You know, being jealous are competitive. I feel like, you know, just self-worth. Is that what I said? I said.

01:02:55:00 - 01:03:01:15 Stephanie I think I think also, some women actually take it to the extreme where they're trying to do too much.

01:03:01:15 - 01:03:03:10 Arianne Yes. Through their worth to.

01:03:03:10 - 01:03:05:11 Stephanie Others and themselves.

01:03:05:13 - 01:03:36:17 Arianne Yes. Yes. Absolutely. You know, I actually there was a quote and it's we are humans being not human doings like so many people are trying to be human doings instead of human beings. And that is right on. Step right on. And so, yeah, I think also, you know, the thing I see is that, you know, not being good enough, not being pretty enough, not being, you know, enough as this person, you know, just competitiveness.

01:03:36:19 - 01:03:44:20 Arianne What's that? Imposter syndrome. Yes. Is that what impostor syndrome is when you're comparing yourself or.

01:03:44:20 - 01:03:48:18 Seth I think I'm an imposter. Soon, when you when you don't think that you measure up.

01:03:48:21 - 01:03:50:00 Seth Okay? Right.

01:03:50:02 - 01:03:55:13 Seth You're rocking. You might be rocking something, okay? But you're like, I'm a fraud.

01:03:55:14 - 01:03:56:06 Seth Inadequate.

01:03:56:08 - 01:03:57:13 Seth I'm inadequate.

01:03:57:15 - 01:03:58:07 Arianne Okay, so.

01:03:58:08 - 01:03:58:23 Stephanie You know.

01:03:59:00 - 01:04:04:16 Arianne The wrong. I think I'm really going on. Right. Okay. Yeah. Okay. Yeah.

01:04:04:18 - 01:04:17:05 Seth So you feel like at the core, so many women really are fighting this false narrative. Of that I'm not good enough. I don't measure up. I'm. Yeah.

01:04:17:07 - 01:04:17:22 Arianne I'm not pretty.

01:04:17:22 - 01:04:19:00 Seth I'm not blank enough.

01:04:19:01 - 01:04:21:01 Seth Yeah. It's just I'm not blank enough.

01:04:21:01 - 01:04:21:19 Seth I'm not enough.

01:04:21:23 - 01:04:22:23 Seth I that's exactly.

01:04:22:23 - 01:04:46:22 Arianne Because, I mean, when I look back in my life and the different roots of things, that's always where it went back to is I was not good enough. Always. And I remember my mom saying, why are you never good enough? Or why is your, you know, self esteem so low? And I was like, I don't know. You know, at that point I, I didn't know I didn't know why I struggled so much.

01:04:47:00 - 01:04:54:02 Arianne But I mean, I do feel like that's a big one. It might not be number one, but it's a big one.

01:04:54:04 - 01:05:10:07 Stephanie That is a huge one. I'm thinking of all these different quotes. You know, you're like, I'm not pretty enough. I'm not. And I'm like, oh, I've got a quote for that. Oh, I've got a. Or like the, the B, you know, the, the doing the, being the.

01:05:10:09 - 01:05:11:05 Seth Human beings human.

01:05:11:05 - 01:05:13:21 Seth Doing. Yes. Thank you.

01:05:13:23 - 01:05:27:22 Stephanie Even that like it made me think of a quote that I've, you know, read for years. And it hit me so hard the first time I read it was, if you're too busy to pray and read your scriptures, then you're busier than God intended you to be.

01:05:27:22 - 01:05:30:11 Arianne Oh, yeah, I love that.

01:05:30:13 - 01:05:32:18 Stephanie Whoa. That's so true.

01:05:32:20 - 01:06:09:21 Arianne Yeah, well, I often think we stay busy because that's a medication of some sort. That's what keeps us from keeping, you know, thinking about our situations. Are thinking about ourselves, are thinking about what's what's going on. Like, I feel like it's a self-medicated thing. And, you know, when you start to really find the silence or the forced from within instead of your, you know, out here that at that does start to shift, you know, and I think that quote of, what I said about, stress less accomplished, more like you really do.

01:06:09:21 - 01:06:12:08 Arianne I mean, I it's amazing and I.

01:06:12:10 - 01:06:21:19 Stephanie I think that's that's actually what, this doctor, naturopathic doctor that we're working with right now. And she do remember her saying that to you?

01:06:21:21 - 01:06:24:16 Seth I just ignored it.

01:06:24:18 - 01:06:26:18 Stephanie How busy?

01:06:26:20 - 01:06:30:14 Seth She said something to me.

01:06:30:16 - 01:06:33:02 Seth Doctor Jain, shout out to Doctor Jain. Yeah.

01:06:33:03 - 01:06:53:07 Stephanie So she she because she's like, okay, look at your schedule because talking about you know, something's gotta give so that you can give more to your family or give, you know what I mean? Do you remember segmenting your day and saying, you know, can you can you do like a hard stop at a certain time so you can give more time and attention to your family?

01:06:53:09 - 01:06:57:20 Stephanie And then she talked about how that would actually give back more to your business.

01:06:57:22 - 01:07:00:07 Seth They were too totally counterintuitive.

01:07:00:07 - 01:07:00:20 Seth Doesn't work.

01:07:00:20 - 01:07:06:19 Seth That way. My has done would probably agree with you know but.

01:07:06:22 - 01:07:32:18 Seth This is me and yesterday was an an anomaly. That was yesterday was a unique day. But you know Steph you had some friends over and and I had been gone with, with our younger girls for four hours getting buffalo meat at the Buffalo ranch up in the mountains. And, and I brought home, like, five buffalo hearts.

01:07:32:21 - 01:07:52:13 Seth Was packaging them all was amazing. Anyway, so it's 10:00 at night. No, it's like 1030 at night, and I'm literally doing business. I'm on my phone doing business, you know, leave messages and stuff like. So, you're going to wind down today like. Yeah, right now. Good night.

01:07:52:15 - 01:07:55:23 Seth But I say something really interesting.

01:07:56:01 - 01:08:21:14 Seth About this conversation. We we actually, we had a doctor, Catherine Darley, on the show, from the Pacific Northwest. She is, a sleep doctor. And that traffic sleep doctor. Very insightful conversation about sleep. About sleep, which is kind of a and I love to sleep. I loved, I love to sleep, I love sleep, I love sleeping in church.

01:08:21:16 - 01:08:23:18 Seth I love sleeping during the short talks.

01:08:23:20 - 01:08:24:21 Seth And during the long.

01:08:24:21 - 01:08:37:21 Seth Talks I was in. I was in the men's meeting the other day and the priesthood meeting, and I literally was fell straight asleep straight, you know, straight back from the speaker until they called on me to answer the question, I love sleep.

01:08:37:23 - 01:08:46:11 Stephanie I will thank whoever came up with a quote. Sleep like a baby has never had a baby. They have a baby. You don't.

01:08:46:11 - 01:08:47:04 Seth You do not.

01:08:47:04 - 01:08:49:21 Stephanie I want to sleep like my husband.

01:08:49:23 - 01:08:54:01 Arianne Right? That's it. You should do that once.

01:08:54:03 - 01:08:54:18 Seth Sorry. Go ahead.

01:08:54:19 - 01:09:10:01 Seth No no no no, I love, but having said that, I like. Listen, I'll. If I have to stay up late, if I have to grind to stay up late and then get up early because I'm heading to the gym to play basketball at 6 a.m.. So I'm up at 525 and I get six hours of sleep, you know?

01:09:10:01 - 01:09:22:17 Seth So be it. And I'm going to keep this short. But since that podcast and a hamstring injury which has kept me off the basketball, I don't know if that's God.

01:09:22:19 - 01:09:23:14 Seth Honestly.

01:09:23:16 - 01:09:26:14 Stephanie You just answered your own question.

01:09:26:16 - 01:09:31:21 Seth Because if I hadn't had that hamstring and do you know, like, yes.

01:09:31:21 - 01:09:33:01 Stephanie I do know.

01:09:33:03 - 01:09:34:12 Seth I would just be.

01:09:34:14 - 01:09:42:17 Seth I would just be saying that was a nice podcast and like, you know, so I went to bed at 1130 and I got up at 530. And that's just the kind of we grind like, that's what you do.

01:09:42:17 - 01:09:44:18 Seth That's that's what you do.

01:09:44:20 - 01:09:47:18 Seth Right? That's what I that is true. That's what I do.

01:09:48:00 - 01:09:50:02 Seth That's not what it is.

01:09:50:04 - 01:09:54:20 Seth Right. Like I'm like, it's 945, where is that girl?

01:09:54:22 - 01:09:57:04 Seth You know.

01:09:57:06 - 01:10:03:21 Seth But I have I took her her she has a ten day sleep experiment.

01:10:03:23 - 01:10:04:22 Seth Oh. Okay.

01:10:05:00 - 01:10:13:18 Seth To use no alarm clock for ten days. And I'm like, hey, right. Just kind of like when you said meditation both on, like.

01:10:13:20 - 01:10:15:01 Seth Like, you know.

01:10:15:03 - 01:10:31:10 Seth I feel like, you know, and and so I've done that and it's probably been two months. It's been miserable because I haven't played basketball into that. Right? I'm still healing this hamstring.

01:10:31:11 - 01:10:32:04 Seth

01:10:32:05 - 01:10:49:18 Seth And I have basically pretty much not used my alarm clock. I've set my alarm clock. It's kind of like, okay, if I if I'm in bed, you know, for nine hours and I'm not up yet, I'm going to set the alarm, you know, just just in case. Because but I haven't had any early morning meetings for church. I haven't had basketball.

01:10:49:20 - 01:10:53:12 Seth And, which is what I really get up to do, you know.

01:10:53:13 - 01:10:57:12 Stephanie Oh, why don't you get up and meditate now? Yeah. So are your mind.

01:10:57:16 - 01:10:58:20 Seth Well, way.

01:10:58:22 - 01:10:59:14 Seth All right.

01:10:59:16 - 01:11:20:05 Seth I think I did get up. I think I did get up once to go fishing with with Ruth. You know, we were up at like 5:30 a.m., but for the most part, I have really set I've done an experiment on my body, you know, with my aura ring here, tracking my sleep in my ordering and basically getting to bed super late like that.

01:11:20:05 - 01:11:40:00 Seth Like we're going to bed too late after midnight. Like I haven't been to bed before midnight five times in the last two months. Pardon me 1135 times like this. But but I'm going to bed. And since I can't get up for one of the things I absolutely love to do.

01:11:40:02 - 01:11:44:03 Seth Put on my basketball blouse.

01:11:44:04 - 01:11:45:05 Seth I sleep.

01:11:45:07 - 01:11:53:19 Seth I sleep until I wake up. Wow 8:00 738, 830 often, sometimes nine.

01:11:53:21 - 01:11:55:05 Seth Wow.

01:11:55:07 - 01:12:07:01 Seth And I'm. Yeah. And I'm telling you, interesting thing. Very interesting thing. And this is too early. I don't have all the data, but but I'm talking about sleep. But I'm also talking about meditation.

01:12:07:01 - 01:12:08:02 Arianne Right, right.

01:12:08:04 - 01:12:10:12 Seth Shalom, Shalom to the.

01:12:10:14 - 01:12:11:16 Seth Shalom cheese.

01:12:11:18 - 01:12:15:04 Seth Cheesecake. Okay.

01:12:15:06 - 01:12:51:02 Seth Is that, I my my a my readiness score on my aura ring has been trending upward. And interestingly enough, I have. And again, this is too early to say, but my hrb so my heart rate variability, which for me as a go go person, like I always pride myself on how much I can accomplish. But our our our doc, our doc, doctor Jane's like your HIV is too low, meaning that you don't have this variable.

01:12:51:05 - 01:13:28:18 Seth In other words, you're always, you know, like like your RPMs on your engine, Seth. They're always up there midline. You need to have that time where it goes down. So you need to have you need to have a big gap between, you know, your high times and your low times. And for me there's hardly any variability. It's like even if I'm sleeping right, which long term probably not the best way to to to be again do less, accomplish more stress less, accomplish more and sleep more, accomplish more for me.

01:13:28:18 - 01:13:54:12 Seth You know, for me. And this just was crazy to me. I open up my phone the other day, my aura app, and it said, we're noticing a trend. You've been trending for the last eight weeks. And your heart rate, your your your readiness score is continuing to rise and you've set a new baseline. And I'm like, I'm like, actually, I want to say a really nasty word right?

01:13:54:14 - 01:13:58:20 Seth Meaning that, dang, this is working.

01:13:58:22 - 01:14:01:01 Seth So when I change.

01:14:01:03 - 01:14:09:03 Seth So when I play basketball, babe, I'm going to bed at 930. And we're going to have to make an adjustment. But.

01:14:09:05 - 01:14:09:22 Seth But I just thought.

01:14:09:22 - 01:14:27:12 Seth How interesting. I'm sleeping. I love to sleep when I'm supposed to be awake. Like I sleep in church. Right. I'll sleep. You know, I can sleep, sit down and take a nap. Easy like I will. Probably because I wasn't getting the sleep I need. So anyway, anyway, you know, I,

01:14:27:14 - 01:14:38:15 Stephanie Yeah, I will say that I. I've noticed that because usually Sundays he's, like, out on the couch. So you have not been doing that. And trust me, I maybe for one.

01:14:38:17 - 01:14:41:00 Seth This is the moment when you realize.

01:14:41:02 - 01:14:42:04 Seth That everything that you've been.

01:14:42:04 - 01:14:49:08 Seth Doing, the sacrifices you've been making, you know, the God thing. We don't really want to sacrifice because your traffic and you're getting more sleep.

01:14:49:10 - 01:14:50:08 Seth It really is.

01:14:50:08 - 01:14:56:01 Seth Good for you. Yeah. That's exactly how I'm feeling. I know I'm going to feel about meditation.

01:14:56:06 - 01:14:58:07 Seth Solutely it's I know I'm.

01:14:58:07 - 01:15:01:21 Seth Going to like, sleeping more. And we take a 20 minute meditation.

01:15:01:21 - 01:15:03:14 Seth Breaks.

01:15:03:16 - 01:15:05:19 Seth Every single day when I should.

01:15:05:19 - 01:15:08:07 Seth Be grinding. And I'm going to accomplish.

01:15:08:07 - 01:15:10:22 Seth Twice as much. And God's going to say.

01:15:11:00 - 01:15:12:02 Seth You're welcome.

01:15:12:04 - 01:15:18:04 Arianne I hope so. I like what you said, that new baseline. That's what it said on the app.

01:15:18:06 - 01:15:19:07 Seth Yes.

01:15:19:09 - 01:15:24:01 Arianne I love that. And baseline.

01:15:24:03 - 01:15:31:05 Stephanie It'll be interesting to see what our aura data is. If we do 100 days of meditation and meditation.

01:15:31:07 - 01:15:54:21 Seth I'll tell you another thing. I my RV and I don't look at it all the time, I I'm gathering this data, and I'm so busy right now that I'm not even looking at it most of the time. But I have noticed my RV rate variability is up like, like double digit up, and so much so that our doctors talked about it.

01:15:54:21 - 01:16:07:19 Seth Hey, what did you do? I'm like, I don't know what I did, but but I'll tell you doctor, doctor Catherine Darley okay. You're you're ten day sleep experiment. I'm not healed. And so now I'm on an eight.

01:16:07:19 - 01:16:12:09 Seth Weeks this year.

01:16:12:11 - 01:16:16:12 Seth And and I'm probably healthier.

01:16:16:14 - 01:16:18:10 Stephanie There's no probably.

01:16:18:12 - 01:16:40:05 Seth But but but I'm going to come back and I'm going to I'm going to come in with a quote right now. Oh I'm actually going to quote Ariane. Oh, the purpose of meditation is not to get good at meditation. The purpose of meditation is to good, to get good at life. Yeah.

01:16:40:07 - 01:16:43:09 Seth Wow. Yeah.

01:16:43:11 - 01:16:52:23 Arianne And that's worked. I feel like that's the only reason why I can teach is because I've lived it and I've walked the walk.

01:16:53:01 - 01:17:10:23 Seth I'm remembering something from when you came back from one of the one of the retreats that you've do right, that you've been on, and you were with Harry, and now you're talking about meditation and talking about like, I don't I don't remember how how like 20 like you do you do longer meditations too though. Like. Or is it there's 20 minutes.

01:17:10:23 - 01:17:11:14 Seth Kind of like I.

01:17:11:14 - 01:17:12:14 Arianne Just do 20 minute.

01:17:12:14 - 01:17:13:07 Seth I think.

01:17:13:09 - 01:17:14:00 Arianne You can now.

01:17:14:05 - 01:17:17:10 Seth You're like, okay, well I remember.

01:17:17:10 - 01:17:18:19 Arianne I do 20 minutes.

01:17:18:21 - 01:17:19:06 Seth Okay.

01:17:19:10 - 01:17:38:19 Seth I remember some of this is months and months ago because you haven't been on a retreat for some time together. Right. And I remember you talking about meditation. All these have is this memory is like, that is an awful long time to meditate. You're talking about, man. But now it's only 20 minutes. I'm like, okay, maybe I, I could probably do it.

01:17:38:21 - 01:17:39:02 Seth Yeah.

01:17:39:03 - 01:17:54:21 Stephanie No, you just need to know it. It's been over a year since it was right before I went to Africa. Yep. And I went to her retreat. So I guess you just. God was like, okay, here's the next year, I'm going to prepare you to realize that 20 minutes really is not that long.

01:17:54:23 - 01:18:14:17 Arianne No, it's, you know, and if you do it first thing in the morning, I do it first thing I like, I literally roll out of bed and that's the first thing I do. And it was, you know, all the everything ever is asleep. Still, you're actually kind of in that not deep state, but you're relaxed and you haven't thought about your day and all the craziness.

01:18:14:17 - 01:18:19:12 Arianne And so it is, I find it a little easier to quiet the mind to.

01:18:19:14 - 01:18:44:16 Stephanie I could totally see that. I actually saw a video yesterday, I think, on Instagram about this guy talking about why it is so bad for you to wake up and immediately look at your phone, and it's because there are four phases of sleep until you're fully awake and alert, and you need to go through those four steps, to not stress your mind.

01:18:44:18 - 01:18:58:18 Stephanie So when you first wake up and you open your phone and you look at it, you're jumping to the fourth step. And so your mind does I have that time in that process to gently get there. And so you're actually causing a lot of stress on your mind. Wow.

01:18:58:18 - 01:19:07:19 Arianne I mean, when you think about that is the first thing many people do. The very first thing I know my teenagers do.

01:19:07:21 - 01:19:21:11 Stephanie I'm guilty of that sometimes. Yeah. But since I saw that I was like two immediately this morning and I looked at it because I like to look at the time, you know, to see how much I like, oh okay. I can go back to sleep for a few more hours or I can't.

01:19:21:13 - 01:19:22:23 Arianne Yeah.

01:19:23:01 - 01:19:31:22 Stephanie But I was like, okay, I'm going to look gently and then I'm just going to put it down. And, and I notice like I woke up slower this morning and it was really nice.

01:19:32:00 - 01:19:36:16 Seth Yeah. Nice. Yeah.

01:19:36:18 - 01:20:07:01 Seth Working from a Christian reference Ariane. There, there within within within Christianity. Have you run into any resistance being a freaking love Jesus on your T-shirt but meditating Hindu words in this case you're actually meditating Hebrew. But we talked about mantras like, like like that's so foreign to people there.

01:20:07:01 - 01:20:21:23 Arianne You know, there's more quotes coming out from church leaders and the Church of Jesus Christ already, saints talking about meditation and being silent. And, there's a book that's been written, I'm.

01:20:21:23 - 01:20:23:15 Seth Finding that.

01:20:23:16 - 01:20:52:20 Arianne Everybody wants to do it. Like I'm fascinated at the different retreats I've done with other people, and they're so excited to come learn about meditation. One thing that I felt as I was developing my type of meditation is that I did feel like I wanted to do a faith based meditation, so that's why I did do the Hebrew words and the Hindu words and give people the option to choose what they want.

01:20:52:22 - 01:21:12:13 Arianne I do believe there's good in all things. Absolutely. I am the most open minded person and I will find what works for me and let the rest go. I don't get caught up, you know, on the little things. And so, I haven't I don't feel like I've had a lot of pushback yet. I mean, who knows, right?

01:21:12:15 - 01:21:16:20 Seth But let's take that shirt. Let's take that shirt to the south.

01:21:16:22 - 01:21:18:11 Seth Right, guys? And they're going.

01:21:18:11 - 01:21:25:17 Seth To love that. But I wonder if you might be get a little kick back. I get a little kick back on the meditation. Maybe not. Maybe not. Hopefully not again I don't know.

01:21:25:17 - 01:21:48:16 Arianne Yeah. It's you know, I just was out in Alabama and did a little meditation class for my sister in law and her, two daughter in laws, and they were both excited about it. But they're both from, let's see, Utah in Arizona. So I guess they're from the West, but I, I wonder if their husbands were like, what in the heck?

01:21:48:16 - 01:21:54:01 Arianne Because they're all from Alabama. So yeah, I don't.

01:21:54:03 - 01:21:54:13 Seth I, I'm.

01:21:54:17 - 01:22:10:10 Arianne Quite sure on the I mean, when my husband and I very first went and took our class, he was very worried that it was going to take the place of our religion. Like that's one of the first things he brought up. Yes. One of the first things that to the facilitator he said, well, I don't want this to take the place of my religion.

01:22:10:10 - 01:22:33:10 Arianne And the facilitator said, this has nothing to do with religion. This is actually going to bring you closer to whoever it is that you worship, right? Like it? It's not about religion per se, you know. But but I do believe faith centered, Christ centered. I'm always going to go back to Christ. That is who I am. And so I will always bring that to the plate.

01:22:33:10 - 01:22:53:12 Arianne Like when I teach my meditation classes, we always start with prayer. I feel like that's very important. You know, allow the spirit to come in and help you through this process. And if you need downloads, because, often when you're done meditating, you can you can possibly receive some personal revelation and write that down or anyway, so.

01:22:53:14 - 01:23:01:16 Seth So I, we, I know, I know you're, you've got a, you've got another booking here. So we got to end. But I all these questions are like I'm getting excited.

01:23:01:16 - 01:23:04:11 Seth About I want to do another episode the weekend.

01:23:04:13 - 01:23:12:10 Seth I just so here's my question how when you teach a class on meditation, like how long does that take you and and do you take people through a meditation?

01:23:12:10 - 01:23:36:17 Arianne Yeah, absolutely. The actual class I teach is about an hour or so. It's not super long, but the power of having a retreat is being able to meditate together, because that's when the questions start to come up. That's when everybody's brain start like, well, what about this? And what about this? And I had this happen. And so, that's why I love doing retreats because I teach a class on obviously how to meditate.

01:23:36:17 - 01:23:59:04 Arianne And then I teach a class on subconscious programing and why it's so important to get our subconscious mind working in the correct direction, which I help people write, a power statement, which I didn't do this in the first retreat, step. I did this on my second retreat. So everyone leaves with like a statement or proclamation on, meditating.

01:23:59:06 - 01:24:01:09 Arianne So anyway, have.

01:24:01:09 - 01:24:05:14 Seth You ever done a class online? I have not.

01:24:05:16 - 01:24:10:06 Arianne Because I'm kind of technology challenged.

01:24:10:08 - 01:24:12:05 Seth Is it possible? Wrong? Is it possible.

01:24:12:05 - 01:24:12:22 Seth To just.

01:24:13:00 - 01:24:16:08 Seth Do the emfs, like, cancel out the benefits of.

01:24:16:10 - 01:24:18:03 Seth Meditating?

01:24:18:05 - 01:24:30:05 Arianne I am wearing an EMF necklace. Yes, I, I've done, zoom. I did a zoom call for, you know, a group of life coaches. It's absolutely. I could teach that. Yeah.

01:24:30:07 - 01:24:38:12 Stephanie So something one dream that I have and I'm. I'm saying this so that stuff can help me. Do my dream because it does involve him.

01:24:38:16 - 01:24:40:21 Seth As you wish. I just.

01:24:40:23 - 01:24:47:15 Stephanie I, I would love to do a couples retreat.

01:24:47:17 - 01:25:00:01 Seth Yeah. You've been saying that for years. I'm I'm I'm I'm meaning that it's it's coming, it's coming. It's like it's kind of living on the mountain. Some rock on underneath the soil. And it keeps on our. Our mountain grows rocks.

01:25:00:03 - 01:25:03:05 Seth And so it's gone to the surface.

01:25:03:07 - 01:25:13:00 Stephanie Yeah, yeah. And I'm just thinking about how beneficial it was for your marriage to do that. And like, oh my goodness, we could totally do this at a retreat. Absolutely.

01:25:13:03 - 01:25:14:15 Seth The couples it's.

01:25:14:15 - 01:25:23:20 Arianne The cool thing too, was I started doing it and Jason didn't get on board for quite a while, but he saw changes in me. And so then he got on board.

01:25:23:21 - 01:25:26:19 Seth Yeah, man. Results driven.

01:25:26:21 - 01:25:44:01 Arianne But it's interesting because, he, he saw these changes in me, and it was interesting how our marriage was still shifting because of the changes that were taking place in me. And then when he's, you know, I really started meditating and the changes started shifting in him. I was just like, you know, it's been great. It's been awesome.

01:25:44:05 - 01:26:00:00 Arianne Do we still have our trials? I don't want to ever put an expectation out there. I'm all about intention. No expectations because life is hard. It's never going to stop being hard. Trials and challenges are for our benefit. That is what helps us become the people that we're becoming.

01:26:00:00 - 01:26:16:22 Stephanie So one of, recently a quote and I'm totally going to butcher it because I've seen it actually put out there in a couple different ways. But essentially, like, I'm, I'm working through my trauma, not so that I can handle life, but so I can handle joy. Yes.

01:26:17:00 - 01:26:19:15 Seth Oh, yes. I love that you said.

01:26:19:15 - 01:26:24:21 Seth It that way. I'm going to quote you on that. I'm.

01:26:24:23 - 01:26:26:04 Seth Yes.

01:26:26:06 - 01:26:29:20 Arianne That's exactly that's interesting.

01:26:29:22 - 01:26:40:11 Stephanie How that aligns with meditation, how, you know, like you said, you're amongst the chaos and all that's going on, the trials in your life. And at the same time, yes, you have joy.

01:26:40:12 - 01:27:01:15 Arianne Finding peace and joy. I look back on earlier years. I be like, oh, that was the worst year of my life. And and I'm really not joking. The last two years have been very hard. And I look back at them and I'm like, there was so much joy. That was the best year amongst so much hard, like really, really hard things like death and lots of car accidents.

01:27:01:15 - 01:27:03:02 Arianne And anyway, just like that.

01:27:03:04 - 01:27:09:01 Seth Amazing. And cut. It's a wrap.

01:27:09:03 - 01:27:24:05 Stephanie Thank you so much for being here today. And thank you for sharing this episode with that one friend who needs this conversation. Thank you for all the ratings, the reviews, the comments, and especially the support. We so appreciate you.

01:27:24:07 - 01:27:38:07 Seth Now, if you want to take a peek behind the curtain and be the first to know about special previews, backstage updates here at the show, and especially some private collection content that doesn't come out in the regular show.

01:27:38:09 - 01:27:43:06 Stephanie Be sure to join our VIP community at the Forever Young Show on.

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